It's been a couple of days now, and while the punk rock scene has mostly heard of the story, the rest of North America's reactions are starting to be seen. Mainstream news websites are reporting the story, saying that Gabel is the first rock-start to be openly transgendered. While he may be the most relevant and popular, it is certainly untrue as Life Of Agony vocalist is Keith Caputo (now known as Mina) is currently in the transition process, and Lucas Silveria of the Cliks, is a transgendered man - these are only two examples.
But still. This is a big story, and the way that Gabel decided to break it - though a mammoth media outlet such as Rolling Stone magazine - seems to a message to everyone who feels uncomfortable with what they've been dealt. Also, with the basic legacy of a band like Against Me! within the alternative music scene over the span of the last ten years, a story like this has caused a huge wave.
I decided to weigh in, now that the reality of it has set for me.
Plenty of internet reactions have blown my mind so far. The internet is such a strange thing. The things you say can be read by anyone, misinterpreted, blown out of proportion, and so forth. It's important to remember that most people on the internet are speaking from a stream of consciousness, much like they would to their friends on the street. And it's a two-way street, people should know that not everything needs to be said, and their opinion is just that. Every one of us has a different perspective, we're all at different places in our lives, and who knows what's drawing us to feel the way we do/say the things we say.
But regardless of all that, I'm still going to voice my opinion on this whole subject in a detailed post, even if it's unnecessary.
I don't remember the first time I heard Against Me!, but I know it was the Crime As Forgiven By... record. I didn't stop listening to it for days. I rode the bus to school and stared out the window, completely lost in the music. I would play along on my guitar, which I didn't know how to play. I would sing along in my bedroom, even though I couldn't understand half the words. I was fifteen years old.
Over the years, I've always loved Against Me! the same. In 2005, I traveled to Edmonton to see them, then back home to Calgary that same night to see them the next day. After the encore at the Calgary show, we were kicked off stage to the side for jumping up and singing with the band. They came and sat with us and we talked for a while. They were very nice people, and Tom was very shy, but sweet.
After Against Me! signed to Sire records, they were written off by my friends. I kept listening to whatever they would put out, and for the most part, enjoying it heavily (I still listen to them nearly every day, and "White Crosses" is in heavy rotation on my iTunes as well as in the kitchen I work). I think they are an amazing band, and them having their records put out by Sire didn't make that much of a difference. Even though that period is over, they made great music.
I was laying in my bed, falling asleep on Wednesday night when I snapped out of it and opened my tumblr feed (which I have about four people on) and saw a post by a friend of mine regarding Tom Gabel. I thought he was being cute, making a joke, because none of my friends are very big fans of the band. But as I kept researching and realizing it was true, I went deeper. I thought about it. I thought about the lyrics. I looked up what Tom was going through. I let it soak all in. I couldn't sleep. I listened to the band all night, and all day at work the next day, and almost broke down crying on my way to work while listening to "Bamboo Bones".
I'm a man. I'm a 24 year old man. I've been called a faggot all my life because I can't live up to what many people's standards are for being a man. I don't want to. As much as I am a man, and people have called me "manly" in the past, I'm not comfortable. Still, I am a male. I am not going through what Tom is going through. I will never fully understand. I won't pretend like I do. But I can try to put myself in her shoes. I can try to be supportive and show my love for someone who affected my life more than any other musician has.
Last year I went through some tough times and was couch surfing in Vancouver. I met someone who was trans, female to male. We did drugs together, and they tried to fuck me, but I was too high to be into it. Instead, we sat on their bathroom floor with our shirts off and they told me their life story. I was amazed at how strong this person had to be. I learned a lot that night, and I can only try to apply that to my understanding of Laura Jane Grace.
All my support and love, this is the coolest thing that has happened in Punk Rock for years.
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